Sarah Neben: Going 'home' again for the fourth time

Once again puzzles, music and dancing, reading books, snacks, free play time, and lots of laughter will dominate my days.

July 1 was my first day back as the director of Shining Star Preschool in Lexington, which has been a ministry of our church, First United Methodist, for nearly 30 years.

This is the fourth time I will be employed by our church. In the early 90s, I served as the secretary/treasurer. I worked there until 1993 when I left to become a stay-at-home mom to our first-born son Brian.

Four more children followed in quick succession and they kept us busy. I was at home with them for 13 years.

In 2006, I spotted an article in our church newsletter that said they were hiring an assistant preschool teacher. It seemed ideal for me.

It was around 30 hours a week, and I would have holidays and summers off to be with our kids. I applied and got the job.

Three years later the director, Melanie Shubert, announced she would be leaving at the end of the 2009 preschool year. I then moved into the director position. I loved that job.

However, in 2015, my dad, Tom, became very ill — he had been fighting prostate cancer for nearly seven years.

I wanted to be able to help mom care for him, as she had the responsibility of being dad’s primary caregiver for years. I made the difficult decision to leave preschool and turned in my resignation.

Sadly, I could not spend much time with dad or help mom like I wanted to. After a long, hard-fought battle, dad passed away on July 11.

Not even two months passed since I had left preschool, but what was done was done, and I needed to move forward.

I jumped around and did lots of different things in the ensuing years. Fast forward to the summer of 2021, and the church was again looking to fill the assistant preschool teacher position.

It had been six years, but I felt the pull of my heart leading me back to being with young children. It was different to go back as the assistant rather than the director.

However, I had so much going on in my life at the time I was grateful I didn’t have the added responsibility that comes with being the director.

In 2022-23, I served a district superintendent appointment, at the Elwood/Bertrand United Methodist parish. It was a wonderful and uplifting time, but also challenging as I basically had two full-time jobs.

My time at the parish ended in 2023, and I continued at preschool.

As 2024 dawned I began to worry about mom as she started having health challenges. I needed to step into being mom’s primary caregiver.

My brother and sister-in-law are in Papillion, which isn’t far, but much of the responsibility for looking after mom fell to me. And honestly, I didn’t (and still don’t) mind.

Mom is one of my best friends, and I wanted to do the best I could for her. I didn’t know if I could focus on preschool when my heart said I needed to be with mom.

After weeks of agonizing and lots of tears, I decided to leave preschool again for the same reason I left in 2015 — to help care for a parent.

And, if I am being honest, much of the assistant teacher’s position revolved around art, and that is not my forte.

However, I knew when I left preschool a second time that it would probably be the last–and that was hard.

But I don’t regret these last two years spent helping mom. It was great to be able to take her to appointments, go grocery shopping, and to treat her to lunch a couple of times a week.

Mom’s health took a turn at the beginning of the year, and she moved to a care facility in Bertrand in February.

Around the same time, I was reading our church’s online newsletter and saw a post that stopped me in my tracks: it said Christy Treffer would be retiring at the end of the school year, and they were taking applications for director for Shining Star Preschool.

I sat staring at that for a long time. I’ve had my own health challenges this last year and I remember thinking to myself, “That ship might have already sailed — I may have lost my chance a long time ago.”

I didn’t do anything for several months. But it felt like someone was whispering in my ear to go for it.

My first call was to my oncologist’s office because if she didn’t think it was a good idea I wouldn’t apply. But she told me, “You have to go live your life, Sarah.”

I sent in my resume and application and I got the job!

For the fourth time I will be working for the First United Methodist Church. Can you go home again? I would answer with a resounding yes!